


Occasionaly I Give A Damn

by ThrowMeAStory



Series: Once Upon A POV [3]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Between Episodes, Captain Hook | Killian Jones In Love, Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Emma Swan Fluff, Childhood Memories, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Minor Character Death, POV Emma, POV Female Character, Recovered Memories, Season/Series 04, Self Confidence Issues, at the end, between 4A and 4B
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:41:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28979061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThrowMeAStory/pseuds/ThrowMeAStory
Summary: Emma learns to lean on someone else.
Relationships: Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Emma Swan
Series: Once Upon A POV [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2208855
Kudos: 18
Collections: Once Upon A POV





	Occasionaly I Give A Damn

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Hello. This is set after the first part of season 4(frozen arc). No hate for David or Snow(he's in my top 5 characters).Enjoy!

"My greatest weakness? Occasionally I give a damn." -Jessica Jones

Looking to both ends of the street, I cross the road and walk up the stairs to the front door of Granny's. By the time I'd finished at the station and made my way over here, the diner was already packed and the party was in full swing. My eyes searched for my son, eventually finding him and his other mom sitting in a booth smack bang in the middle of the diner, along with my pirate. As my gaze landed on them, Killian's eyes snapped up to look straight into mine.

Making my way towards them I see Charming and Snow out the corner of my eye, fussing over Neal as they chatted to Ashley and Aurora. They looked like any other normal young couple with their baby, not a fairytale prince and princess with a grown up daughter almost the same age. Ignoring the sadness I felt rising in my chest, I sit down next to Killian and Kiss him. Just as we pull apart I hear Regina's groan of absolute disgust.

"Hi Mom."

"Hey Kid." I replied as I removed my red leather jacket and leaned back into Hook's outstretched arm. Wordlessly he slid me a glass of Rum that I hadn't noticed sitting next to his half finished one. Glancing up I saw Regina looking at me expectantly.

"Mayor." I greeted.

"Sheriff Swan." She greeted back, satisfied.

As my head turns back towards my pirate, I immediately get caught in the bright blue of his eyes. His gaze tracing my face intensely like he's trying to take in every detail. His head tilted to the side, licking his lips as he lifted his hand to brush my hair off my neck. His hooked arm curling around my shoulders to pull me closer to him. 

"What?" I asked, starting to feel self conscious as he grinned from ear to ear.

"Nothing love. You are just too beautiful not to stare at. The stars themselves are jealous about how brightly your light shines." He stated, as he leaned forward to kiss me again.

Just as we touched lips I heard Regina gag, while Henry laughed at her reaction. Getting up, she sauntered over to bar. Henry picked up his still near full milkshake and went to sit next to Nicholas and Ava. Pulling apart, I was just about to reply when my dad stood up, ready to make a speech.

"Thank you to everyone who came tonight. We've been through some hard times recently with our newest visitors. But we're all still standing, as one kingdom. We're still here, together."

"Hell yeah!" Grumpy yelled out, causing everyone to laugh and cheer. I looked towards Belle, who was sat at the bar with Will Scarlet. After the diner quietened down he continued. 

" I just wanted to say thank you for standing by my family even though you didn't have to. Now that we've vanquished the monster hopefully we can now have a period of peace. Time you can spend with your family, like the time I will be spending with my son and wife. Thank You!"

After the second batch of cheers died down and the music from the jutebox was audible again, David's words replayed in my head. His wife and son. His family. A perfect little small town family with no room for a messed up orphan.

However something else upset me more.

"You alright love?" Hook asked, the concern written over his face.

"I...I can't...I can't do this." I stuttered out as I stood up. Reaching for my jacket I yanked it on then grabbed the glass of rum, downing it in one and striding towards the door. I heard several people, including Killian call my name but I just carried on walking till I got till the end of the street.

Was that all she was in the end? She sacrificed her life to fix her mistakes, just to be seen as a monster. For wanting a family. Why was I even bothering then?

If I was feared for accidentally causing property damage, then what would happen if I lost control again and hurt someone? What if I said something they didn't agree with or do something they thought was wrong? Would I be thrown out and called a monster? I genuinely had no idea.

I knew there might have been something real in the words Ingrid and I exchanged in the police station but now, experiencing it first hand, I just couldn't get over it. My parent's are not perfect but holy Jesus do they act like it sometimes. Not once have they asked me about Ingrid, even though they know that we had history. It's like they think that apart from them, Henry and the baby I might have never seen anyone else as family.

And they wonder why I'm not keen on calling them Mom and Dad.

Walking in no particular direction, something in the distance caught my eye. Striding up to it, a smile made it's way onto my face. It was on old mint green bike with a wicker basket attached the front. For once a happy memory from my childhood took over.

Me and Ingrid were leaving the school after parents evening. I'd never been to one before, always choosing to skip rather than listen to the teachers recount how below average I was to whichever family I was placed with at the time. Not that the families ever cared about my grades but Ingrid insisted I came in with her, to take it as constructive criticism and use the teachers comments to improve. What they said was a shock to say the least.

Within the 4 months I had been placed with Ingrid my grades had gone up and I was now above average. Not majorly but enough to see a gap from where I was to where I am now. He complimented Ingrid on her positive influence on not just me but also some of the other kids she had under her roof. Then the teacher said something to her that made her eyes sparkle with unshed tears.

"You have a amazing way with family, Miss Fisher ."

We left and headed to the McDonalds near the house. Sitting by the window so I could keep watch on my mint green bike outside, we ate our meals and then went the long way back home. Pushing my bike, I walked alongside her as we talked about what else I wanted to improve on. It was the first time another adult, who wasn't paid, had taken an interest in my education.

"SWAN!"

Not looking back I start to stride ahead, wiping the tears off my face. Before I could take another step forward Hook was in front of me, making stumble backwards as I collided with his chest. He reached out to grab the top of my arms but before he could I dodged and circled around him carrying on along what I now know was the river bank. Without turning back or even stopping, I shouted back to him.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"NO!"

I automatically halted as he came to my side, just staring at me, calmly waiting for me to explain. Opening my mouth I tried to talk but instead of words coming out, it was sobs. His hand held my cheek as his other arm wrapped tightly round my waist, pressing my body into his as he gently rocked me while his forehead was against mine. I couldn't stop the salt water from leaking out my eyes.

I wish I could have said thank you to her. I wish I could have said so many things to her. I wish we could have reconnected. I wish she hadn't taken my memories of her away.

But wishes weren't going to do anything now.

She was dead.

Killian lifted my into his arms and carried me back to B&B. When we got to his room, he went to put me down while he unlocked door but before he could even tilt me, I used my magic. Walking in, he shut the door with his foot and sat me upright on the bed. He removed both our leather jackets.

Letting him maneuver me around, Killian wrapped me up in the comforter and laid me down, before laying on his side so he was facing me. I just laid there in silence for a few minutes with my eyes shut, taking it in. I felt weird having someone comfort me. Weird, but nice. 

"What do you think about Ingrid for our daughter's name?" He asked curiously

Lifting my head, I stared at him. Trying to tell if he was joking. He wasn't. He was deadly serious.

I paused.

"For one of them, yeah." I said smiling.

"One of them? Sounds like I'm on a promise, love."

Laughter rang out through the room.

"You have to keep breaking your heart until it opens." - Rumi


End file.
